Adventures in Tokyo: Gaijin on the Run

I met up with Dennis on the train into Nagano, and still unable to remember anything I had forgotten, the journey was off to an omminously good start. It would hit me soon enough, then I would scream "Ah bollocks!" and smack my forehead, but for now, I would enjoy the ignorance. 6 hours later I found myself in a place called the BBC Sports Bar in Tokyo. I was unsurprised to find it seemed to have nothing to do with either sports or the BBC, but it did have two of the coolest dogs in the world for me to play with and Guinness on tap. Letting the youngest dog chew on my hand, I listened to Dennis and Tiffany catch up with each other and I realised that my first real travel experience in Japan had begun, and that it would good.

The following day was my first full day in Tokyo, and I celebrated it by trying to get through Shinjuku train station. Shinjuku is the busiest train station in the world, and every day over 2 million people go through it. On one of the signs I counted over 15 different train lines in Shinjuku. Using my trusty compass-keyring, I eventually found my way onto the Yamanote line and into Shibuya to meet up with Rob and Kate. Shibuya was a great area of Tokyo, and the three of us found an amazing English pub (burger and chips!), browsed around HMV and checked out dirt dirt cheap second hand computer games. I really wish that I had had more time to check out Shibuya; I only went back there once, to go drinking with Dennis and some of his friends, and if I could only choose one area to visit again next time, it would be Shibuya. The tall buildings blared neon everywhere you looked, and the dense crowds or students and commuters around the station made the place feel exciting and alive. It seemed to be a series of small streets with many people packed in by big shops on either side, not like the depressing grey monotony some of the big shopping streets in London. We retreated back to Rob's flat (1, 2, 3) in south Tokyo (via a long windy path, covered over by trees, the only markings along the road were the sign posts warning us of snakes) and drunk beer and played computer games. Not only was it one of the most fun evenings I have had in ages, but I completely pwn @ Total Overdose, and I will bust up any puto that says otherwise. Mexican Hiphop + Max Payne = unadulterated genius.

Saturday was Sumo day; fat men displaying unbelievable strength, speed and skill. Sumo was really incredible to watch, not just because of the fighting, but also because of the atmosphere and the ceremony. It seems to me to still be very rooted in old Japanese tradition and hasn't succumb too far to commercialism or technology. The ring was very small, but the excellent sloping-circular layout of the arena made you feel like you were looking down a microscope into the past, into something that took place hundreds of years ago instead of something right infront of your eyes. The wrestlers came out and walked around the ring at half time, bowing to the crowd and then disappearing again until they had to fight. A Japanese flag hung above the ring, and the coloured robes of the umpires were opulent and awesome. Sumo was excellent to watch and something I am very glad I have done while I am in Japan.

In the evening, foregoing the option of a Baseball game, I went out to dinner with Andrew and some of his Japanese friends from his university days. They all live in Tokyo now and do real jobs, but each of them studied for a while in the UK and some have lived abroad for longer, making them comfortable with strange gaijin and my non-american accent. They were not only friendly and interesting, but unbelievably hot. The crowd also included Andrew's ex-girlfriend, which may have been my main motivation for going, and my interest was certainly not disappointed. She was very attractive and had excellent English, and as I was sat opposite her we chatted together for most of the evening. I also took it upon myself to help Andrew out a little as she was being unbelievably rude to him, but I that is what happens when good relationships go bad. Dinner was in a beautiful Italian restaurant in Ebisu, a little south of Shinjuku; the waiter was Italian and rude, the food was delicious, and the cost extortionate - it was perfect.

Sunday was my final day in Tokyo, and needing to break free from my companions and head into the unknown alone, I grabbed my bag, filled myself with coffee and set of for Akihabara. Akihabara is the electric district of Tokyo, filled with computer stores, TV and stereo shops, games arcades and wall to wall DVDs and computer games. I didn't want to spend any money, and things got pretty scary when I found the Akihabara Apple Store (god damn you Mac Mini, god damn you to hell!), but I held out and left with only the happy feeling of a morning completely wasted.
I also found my first %100 hentai store (japanese animated pornography). It was out in the open, for all to see and hear, and beckoned people through it's large and exciting doors. Inside, the store was brightly lit and colourful. I found myself surrounded by quiet looking japanese men shuffling around, looking at their feet and trying to avoid any eye contact. Occasionally one would pick up a box, look at it, then return it to the shelf and move down to the next row. How strange I thought. Inside, quiet porn. Outside, bustling street. Inside porn, outside street. But there was no barrier! It was accepted, acceptable, accessable!! Hazaa!! Then I stopped looking around, and looked at myself; these were quiet men, with backpacks on both shoulders and avoiding eye contact. I was a quiet tourist, with a backpack on both shoulders and trying to incite eye contact. This was too close to home and too close to the bone, so I quit while the going was good. Mata ne, aniki-tachi.

And that was my trip to Tokyo. I have photos of lots of these things that I will put up soon - I will edit the links in this post and also put up a new one, so keep your eyes peeled. There were other things that I did and saw in Tokyo, like the Shibuya Dog statue, whose story is too sad to ever be told here, or the young girls dressed as anime characters and maids who walk around on the weekends because they can, but if we don't draw a line now we will be here all day. If you come here, then you can see all these things for yourselves, and I can guarantee it will be much more interesting than reading this.

The Legend of Drunken Master

Firstly, please allow me to apologise for not posting anything for almost two weeks now; I have been busy almost everyday. I got an hour to myself about 3 days ago, and it felt good. But what have I been busy with? you ask. Well, let me tell you!
Two weeks ago there was a party organised by some JETs in Matsumoto, the place with the castle, that I went down to with another ALT her called Dennis. We grabbed a lift down with my predecessor and listened to old Ska for most of the trip down - how could things go badly from there? - then met up with everyone else in a little cafe/bar in the center of town. About 5 hours later, with two and a half hours of all you can drink behind me and then another pub after that, I found myself chatting to an american girl in the bar of a club. Years ago, her family had lived and worked in a village in the US especially constructed to produce the atomic bomb for WWII. Poor safely conditions meant that the radiation eventually caused problems for her grandfather and grandmother, leading to death, and has left her parients with illnesses of their own. We then realised that Karate Kid I was on the TV, so we spent the next 30 mins giving our own enlightened commentary and arguing the eternal debate - Miyagi or Cobra Kai? There was no winner, but I think we all know the truth here... ("Take the knee!"). Once she left the fun seemed to be over for me, so I made my way down to Matsumoto castle again in the hope that I could break in. The castle seemed pretty impenetrable (no surprise there really), so I followed the stray cats that roamed around the castle at night. Together, we considered catching the fish in the moat and then laughed at how foolish we were, and they showed me a nice patch of grass to catch a cheeky nap. Two hours later, I was back on the train making my way home with the knowledge of a job well done.

Last weekend was three days long thanks to Respect for The Aged Day (only the JETs seemed to be greeting each other "Happy Respect for the Aged Day!", I don't think the Japanese were really into it), three days that I filled with coffee and roleplay. I have made a new friend here, a drifter from Chicago who travels by the name of Peter; the first time we met, we both quickly realised each other for what you were:

Me: "... so that's why I hate the UK weight limit on flights to Japan. You guys could bring anything with you! You could bring a suite of armour if you took some in your hand luggage!
Peter: "Not that I have a suit of full plate, of course."
Me: "You don't! That would be your first mistake!"

{ 10 seconds of awkward silence later...}

Me: "So what do you do, table top or live action?"
Peter: "Table top, never done LARP. You?"
Me: "I've seen action, but sitting in a small room pretending i'm a detective will always have my heart."

And so it was that my XMen alternate universe game came to pass.

I also went to my first Ju Jitsu class in Japan - Hakkoryu Ju Jitsu, too old for any of the people there to remember when it started (they can trace it back to another style in the Edo period though...).
The practice room was far too small to comfortably fit the 25 or 30 people there, so most of the exercised were done from kneeling. No mats were used - the dojo only had tatami floor. The head sensei himself was an older guy, unexceptional to look at, with one leg 4 inches shorter than the other. He inflicted pain on his uki like he was sipping from a cup of tea, not a movement wasted, not a conscious thought needed. He was incredible.
One man spoke enough English to help me out, but for the most part I had to work out the moves on my own. The class went at a much faster pace than any English class I have done, and I found myself having practiced 8 separate moves in just as many minutes. The warm up was also one of the most interesting I have ever done as the man taking it, the same gentlemen who drove me down there, has been teaching and practicing yogo for almost 33 years.
As the only gaijin there, I stood out a little bit, and as three quarters of the people there were black belts I think I stood out a little bit more, but not until I had to do rolling breakfalls did people stop, take note and try not to laugh. Apart from that though, I held my own and learnt everything they taught me quicker than they expected. Everyone in the class was friendly and helpful, even those that spoke almost no English, and not a single person practiced with anything to prove or any agression to get rid of.
However, all of this was simply setting the stage for the final act, the grand finale or my incredible class. As if the tatami floor and badass sensei weren't enough, the abundance of black belts making me feel like an extra on Han's Island of Death and the two really really pretty girls on the other side of the room (deadly I tell you, deadly!), half way through the lesson the whole class stopped to have tea. Tables were brought out, tea was pored, and people sat and talked. Some of the younger students practiced headlocks on each other in the corner, while a few of the women stuck up conversation with me using another student as an interpreter. It was perfect. Then, as suddenly, as it all began, the tables disappeared and the room became a dojo again.

Awesome.

And now!! What am I doing today, you ask? Today?! Today I am going to Tokyo! I am leaving work in 15 mins to get home, get changed and throw a bag together before I jump on a train into Nagano. There should be just enough time for me to stuff my face with train station noodles (they have noodle stalls on the platforms - incredible) before running over the road to get my bus to Tokyo. Tomorrow I am catching up with Rob, Ninja Tom's brother, who I haven't seen in ages, and then Saturday will be filled with Sumo tournaments and live gaseball games! Hazaa! I will report back, with photos, as soon as I can.

In the mean time, on a closing note, my work load is becoming ridiculous. My job is becoming really stressful, but I know the more I do now the easier it will be in the next couple of years. And to be honest, I didn't come here for things to be easy.

Teacher: "Some teachers in schools do not think ALTs are best idea."
Me: "I have found that too. I have some friends who feel the teachers resent them being in the classroom."
Teacher: "Ah ha. I think they are good, I think it is better for students to learn English from you than from a japanese teacher."
Where is this going, I think.
Teacher: "So to help you teach students as much as possible, I think you should start planning lessons. All our lessons."
Me: wtf!
Teacher: "OK?"
Me: "OK."
Me: WTF!!

And so with that conversation behind me, I am f***ing off to Tokyo for half a week. Hazaa!

"You can be my wingman anytime."

The soft wind fell over the mountains and came together above the lake, shimmering the surface and keeping me cool in the afternoon sun. I was trying to explain to the man next to me about the relatively flat landscape of England and the mountains of Scotland and Wales, but neither of us really cared - we just enjoyed communicating, sitting, sipping the vendo machine coffee (his hot, mine cold) and letting lunch settle down. Kazama-sensei had just become my new friend even though he has been my neighbour for the last 5 weeks; talking has become easier, but is still only accomplished with great effort and the use of the dictionary on his phone. That day, his phone battery died 20 mins into our journey, but eventually we got used to it. Maybe in the long run it was better this way.
I took some photos of the lake, here and here - the second might be my personal favourite photo out of all those I have ever taken.
The tranquility of the lake, however, is difficult to appreciate without knowing the juxtaposition of what came before it. Lunch, you know that much (if you were paying attention), but what came before the lunch? What came before the lake? Like many travellers know, it is often not the event which is important, the arrival at your destination, but often how you got there and the journey you took. Last saturday, I got to lunch, and to the lake, on a Kawasaki 900cc Super Bike, and it was perhaps the most physically exciting journey I have ever taken. The bike is the same model that is riden by Tom Cruise in Top Gun. By the time we began the journey home, I was leaning into bends that filled me with terror when we first set out, and only when we hit 100 km/h did fear finally make a reappearance. Super Bikes are awsome and I want one.
I took some photos of the bike, here and here - the man in the second one is Kazama, my neighbour for the last 5 weeks and new friend.

No typhoon-death for Craig!

I left school early yesterday to rendezvous at my house with a man from NTT coming to fix my internet. The strong breeze of the impending hurricane made my journey quicker than normal, and gave me little time to wonder how someone would fix the phone lines outside my house in the middle of a hurricane. Telecoms Ninjas? It was the only possible answer. It seems that NTT, however, knew something I didn't; Japanese news is full of lies. The same wind that carried me home was the final breeze of my much anticipated typhoon, and as my journey came to and end, so did my hopes of Telecoms Ninjas. The afternoon was pleasant; I went out for dinner.

Incidently, my phone now works and my internet is half way there, I just need to run a setup CD on my machine so it will configure my router for me. Sorry for the delays all of those who are waiting to talk to me, your patience is appreciated.

More importantly though, these last few days have been a real teaching experience. Yesterday I taught a class with a child in it who seems to have ADD. This meant that the teacher had to stop him from misbehaving while I taught a second year remedial class alone. Yesterday also saw me start a class with another teacher who, no more than 2 minutes into the lesson had to leave (he is also a school administrator, this happens a lot), where he left me with another second year remedial class completely alone for 30 mins. These kids don't speak very much English and aren't that inclined to learn, but I still managed to give them one of the most fun lessons they might have had in a while (god bless vocab games). When the teacher finally returned, we pressed on with tedious reading comprehension and I was asked to help out one child in particular. When the rest of the class are reading "He worked hard and made a fortune, but they lived a simple life and gave their money to poor people", this kid is mispronouncing words like they and were. It took me 5 minutes to read through maybe 100 words with him, but when I was doing it he tried his hardest. Left on his own, he sat there and played with his pencils because he couldn't understand the content, but when I worked with him he showed a complete willingness to try his best. When he left, he said goodbye to me and gave me a wave, something that he has never done in my two and a half weeks here so far. That was one of my best experiences here yet.
And now, in less than 20 minutes, I have to teach a special needs class. It has two children in it who both suffer from autism. There is no syllabus, I have never worked with sufferers of autism before and because the class is so free form, the only thing I have by way of previously studied work is a 10 minute conversation with my predecessor at 11:30 last night. The teacher doesn't speak English either, so no help there. I am really nervous and I have no idea what will happen. I am really looking forward to it.

I hope that everyone who is reading this blog is doing ok, and thank you for taking the time to sift through my ramblings.

Craig

The Art of War

"Nandaka nandaka gashiku nandaka..." points to the sword on the ground.
"... Nandaka nandaka..." more pointing.
"Bla bla bla..." and so it continues.
After a while, Andrew turns to me and says "This part of the sword is called the Gashiku".
Me: "Cool".
Repeat with more words - monouchi, shinai, bokken, etc. I understood none of the japanese, but it was easy enough to comprehend; pointing and naming, naming and pointing. This was excellent. This is why I came to Japan. But it was not all as easy as this, for I was distracted. I tried to focus my attention on his words, but time and time again my eyes drifted toward the back of the class, towards the other students. About 25 people, all dressed from head to toe in the coolest martial arts kit I have ever seen, were trying to kill each other about 20 meters from where I was sitting. Their screams echoed around the hall, the loud boom of their feet as they stamped on the floor, the crash of sword on sword, wood on wood, was all arond me.

Sato Sensei: "Nandaka nandaka Meigi nandaka..."
Andrew: "The bokkun was invented during the Meigi period."
Me: "Cool."

I meant no disrespect, but the noise was like war, 20 meters from me, and they all had swords and I hadn't touched one yet. Patience was to be the key, something I feel learning Kendo will teach me above all else. But then the bokkun was put in my hand, and all was good.

I train again on Saturday. Then again on Tuesday. Then again every Saturday and Tuesday until they kick me out of this country because i'm too much of a Bad Ass to be kept on one set of tiny islands. The longest journeys start with the first step, and sometimes that step gets you a little bit closer to striking distance.

Jeff Goldblum was right all along...

There is no time for recollections of Kendo now, for something much more exciting is happening: school is being evacuated after lunch because a typhoon is coming. Several areas of Japan are already laying in ruins, and today the typhoon moves up north, leaving central Honshu in it's wake. The wind was strong this morning; I watched a leaf fall gracefully from a tree towards the path I walk up every day, and then dash across the road, snatched away by an invisible hand. I believe the typhoon is simply a precurser to the arrival of Godzilla, a warning for those that can still read such an old, prophetic language. Time is short so I will keep it simple, I don't know how much longer I will be able talk.

In actuality, it will be quite boring for most people here. Nagano is protected by the mountains, and only with typical japanese calm could they respond to a typhoon by sending the kids home after lunch as opposed to right now! As my first typhoon, however, I am thoroughly looking forward to it. I will hole myself up with sushi and green tea, and look through my lonely planet to find the names of shinto gods to beg for my safety.

Right now, I have to teach 2.34, so Kendo will have to wait. If I can ever tell my tale at all...

Next time Tanaka, next time...

This weekend turned out to be quite quiet, but was a great one nonetheless. Friday afternoon saw me at an English Teaching meeting in Shinshushinmachi at tiny, perfect little school with a
population of only around 150 students. From there, one of my teachers drove me into Nagano city for my first work enkai, which is Jpanese for 'piss-up'. Enkais seem to involve putting everyone in a small room and a waitor or waitress periodically comes to the door and delivers endless amounts of food, beer and spirits. Initially it reminded me of Martin Jenkins' plan to put 6 to 8 people in a room, locked from the outside, with 2 days supply of Red Bull and no toilet just to see what happened, but this went much better and I had a really good time. My bad Japanese and the surprisingly good English of those around me meant that I managed to talk to people instead of drinking in social solitary, and I even managed to join in a conversation bitching about some troublesome students (it was almost like I'm a real teacher instead of just an imposter). We went from there to a tiny bar on the third floor of another building (at this point, both my memory, reaction speed and Japanese started to fail me) that served only whiskey - we sat round the circular bar, for the place was so small there were no other seats, and he gave us 6 glasses and left the bottle on the table. An hour later, I had one of the best conversations I have had so far with a Japanese person.

Me: Cowboy Bebop...?
Him: Sugoi!

{we both shake hands enthusiastically and toast with more whiskey}
{... 45 seconds of silence...}

Me: Nadesico...?
Him: Sugoi!

{we both shake hands enthusiastically and toast with more whiskey}
{... a minute and a half of silence...}

Me: Er... (builds up to it...) ... Saishu Heiki Kanojo ...?
Him: Sugoi!

The conversation was excellent, but I did feel a little bit bad for the female teacher stuck in between us. But not that bad.


Kendo Update!

Kendo countdown has begun, again! So far I haven't hit a single person with a sword since i've been here and it is starting to get to me; I unconsciously pick up rulers and sheathe them in my belt loops; I become nervous when crossing seemingly empty bridges and the wind picks up; and worst of all, when I met the governer of Nagano I felt the need to insult his entourage as "pathetically loyal dogs" and challenge each one of them to lay their life on the line for the honour of a scoundrel. Govenor Tanaka was actually a very lovely man, and 2 days after I met him formed his own party to challenge Koizumi in the coming elections. Go Tanaka! Good job I checked myself before... well, you know.
So, Kendo is tomorrow!! Kendo, like a new beginning, always seems to we waiting with the new dawn but never arriving. But this time I am taking charge and putting measures in place; getting a schedule, turning people to my cause with the sympathy vote by looking like more of a disheartened loser than normal, etc etc. Soon, mastery of Kendo will be mine, and then I will defeat you Tanaka, I will defeat you once and for all!

Please Please Me

This last week has been pretty interesting, as have all of those so far. All but one of my introduction classes finished last week, so I have been busy this week making lesson plans and trying to execute them without completely screwing up, which so far, I have managed. Girls no longer scream at me, but I suppose that had to end at some time. I still get warm "hello"s, and from one child in particular, an incredibly deep and respectful bow every single time he sees me. Apparently he is that polite to everyone. Bless 'im.
My evenings have been made up of incredible dinners in Nagano city, trying a different restaurant every night. I can't read any of the food labels here, I don't know how to cook the food and I can't read the Kanji on my rice cooker to work out how to turn it on, so I have been eating out a lot since I arrived. The food here is incredibly varied, with a much greater range of cuisine available than when I was in London, and I rarely have to pay more than £10 for a meal. My favourites this week have been Anando's Curry House, where the guy on all the posters and the menus actually works there, speaks amazing english and brings you your food! He then moved on to the next table and started macking on these 3 japanese girls in excellent japanese. What a guy.
Next was an amazing pizzeria not too far from where I live that served a 4 course meal + drink + coffee for about £11.50, and the food was possibly the tastiest I have had since I arrived in Japan. The dessert case was 3 meters long. And double sided. It was beautiful. The waitress scored 8/10 and was under the impression that I spoke much more Japanese than I do. Excellent.
Finally, last night Andrew and I went to a curry house (yes, more curry) that I visited with Kirk in my first week, but it was too busy for us to get seated upstairs before. This time it was empty, and we had our pick of anywhere. The restaurant is very small, but two floors, with a large section cut out of the second floor where you can look down into the bar on the ground. They have a piano and small 4 piece jazz setup next to the stairs, and the whole place is decked out in early 20th century Americana; Beatles albums plaster the walls, replica jukeboxes and radios form tables for the waitresses to work from and Tom & Jerry cartoons are shown on 6 or 7 separate TVs from open till close. We managed to catch some live Jazz/Lounge while we were there, including heavily japanese-accented covers of The Beatles, and the waitress was stunning, an easy 9.5/10, and also completely uninterested in either of us. As we were leaving, a tiny white and ginger cat found it's way to the door or the restaurant, and the barman jammed the door open to let it come in, wander around and leave when it felt like it. I like to think that somewhere out the back a little mouse hole was similarly propped open.